Male Chavunistic Pig

One day , Prem's friend Mr. Jai dropped into the Guruji's house to have a chit chat. Prem was also present there...

Prem =>"Jai , Any chance that u will get a bride soon ?"

Jai =>" Since i am in kerala , there is a small problem...yaar "

Prem =>"??"

Jai =>"These girls earn more than 2 times the salary than us , in Bangalore "

Prem => "Ya, then it is risky to marry them...."

Jai =>"Any way , i might say yes to a propsal even if she is earning more than me ..."

Guruji =>"Sounds interesting .."

Jai =>"My plan is to impregnate her twice in quick succession...this will give me ample time to catch up with her in the salary race..."

A nice lecture

I have started to study the book Introduction to Algorithms in a systematic manner. A colleague of mine took two sessions which covered the chapter 2 and the chapter 3 of this venerable book.
To get a better handle on Asymptotic Analysis , i searched youtube for this. I stumbled upon the following video.

Nothing is impossible

Prem and Tilak were fed up with meeting calls which they are forced to take during the office hours. What was especially annoying to them is these meetings are responsible for many a slippage in the delivery schedule.

One day Prem did talk about this to Tilak,

Prem => " These managers call meeting every day and is just a waste of time. "

Tilak => " To Prove to themselves that they are essential for the company , they are conducting these meetings "

Prem =>"These buggers go home on time and we need to sit late to finish the tasks"

Prem => "Even my girl friend seems to have deserted me.... !!"

Tilak => "I am sick of hearing the parting words .............."

Prem => " You mean ...Nothing is impossible statement of our manager ..."

Tilak => " Ya...excatly "

Prem => "Nothing is impossible for the man who doesn't have to do it himself."

Management Model

One Day , Prem and Tilak were annoyed with their Manager for the lack of clarity in most things they are supposed to do. The New OnSite co-ordinator mr. Ashish Gupta is a bane for both of them. They went to the Guruji to get some advice.

Prem =>"Earlier some white men were controlling us from the US. Now these Indian managers are screwing us from there. "

Guruji =>"Whites realized that the best way to control indians is to use another indian. !"

Tilak =>"Ya , increasingly this trend is visible in the software industry itself. "

Guruji =>" The model is as follows. They will have KEY resources like you people to do the work"

Tilak =>" Then we should get recognition for that ...r8 ?"

Guruji =>"They will appoint a indian DON to manage KEY resources here. Together it is called the DONKEY management model. "

Best Discourse

One day , Prem was bit dizzy while coming back from his home town to his work place. He met Guruji at his residence. Seeing his uneasy state of mind , Guruji decided to do some thing about it.

Guru =>"Hey Prem, you know about Bhagwan Rajneesh ?"

Prem =>"No..!"

Guru =>"He is also called OSHO by his followers. U can listen to his lecture to get ur spirit back"

Pagoda

Some time back , i happen to hear that two guys in our company are engaged in a Verbal battle. I rushed to the spot expecting a certain guy to be thrashed. But , to my surprise he could take the other guy head on and win the battle. I suffixed the term Pagoda along with his name. The picture in my mind was as given below.





















Today morning , one of my colleague showed a japanese shinto temple and told that it is a pagoda. I challenged him and the matter was resolved in his favor by consulting the Wikipedia.

Commitment

The Other day , Prem was critical about some of his colleagues for their alleged lack of commitment to the work. He was bragging about his commitment to work to the Guruji. Guruji got impatient after a while and asked prem the following


Guruji =>"Prem, Can u define what is commitment according to u ?"

Prem =>"It is dedication to what u do. Being proud of what we have done etc.."


Guruji =>"Commitment is the manifestation of fear in oneself"

Who should control the Order ?

Tilak got sick of seeing his brother and his sister-in-law always in conflict. Too often , silly things will flare up to create a mess which is far greater than one could imagine. Perplexed , he went to the Guruji and asked what might be the reason behind this mess. Tilak pointed out to Guruji that Mr. and Mrs. Gasnafer who married roughly around the same time is living with out much of an issue. Mr. Antony and Mrs. Antony is able to hold all the "shit in the pit" as well .

Guruji =>"Men and Women took seperate evolutionary Path. Men are supposed to roam around and Women has to be careful choosing the mate. Now with Monogamy , Women do not have much option left. She has to control her man. Men has to break free from them to satisfy their evolutionary destiny of having more kids, regardless of the women"

Tilak => "What did u really mean ?"

Guruji =>"In Marital Relations , Either men has to be in (almost ) complete control Or Women has to be in complete control. "

Tilak => "In my Home , both are not in control. BTW , what about Gasnafers and Antonys ? "

Guruji =>"From a Sociological perspective , in Islamic households Men are in Complete Control. Since women are not exposed to wider freedom, they are happy to live in the cage"

Tilak =>"Now, u have put Gasnafers into perspective. What about Antonys ?"

Guruji =>"In Christian families ,in most cases Women folk are in control. They actively encourage hedonistic pursuits of their husbands. The reason is Women can make her husband dance when he is in the spell of Alcohol. For Control , Christian Women are willing to trade some inconvenience arising out of this "

Tilak => "Oh...Now i see"

Guruji => "Moral of the story is One of them has to be in complete control. if none of them are in control , some one else will take control of the family.!!!!!"

Tilak => "Oh , Mother in Laws and Mothers are waiting to gain the lost control as well.."

A Tale of Two Sardars

Prem and Guruji were discussing about the mess which piles up in the personal lives of people due to the comparison mania of the society in general.This reminded Prem of a real event which happened in his previous company. The individuals in question were two sardarjis from Ambala. Surjeet Singh and Chandan singh hail from the same village in Ambala district.
When the annual pay revision happened , Surjeet learned that Chandan got a better raise. Angered over this he went and met the manager Vikram Sinha.

Surjeet => " Vikram, i am not satisfied with the pay revision this time around "

Vikram => " The revision only took into consideration the self appraisal form. "

Surjeet => " That form , every one will get the same marks , so how can u differentiate ?"

Vikram => " I think , u better contact ur immediate superior "

Surjeet => " I agree that you cannot give me a rise in the salary , can u do me a favour ? . Pls.
reduce the salary of Chandan "

Performance

When the annual revision was around the corner , Prem and Tilak began to talk less and less. There was element of tension in their relationship. Tilak is in the good books of his manager(s).
He was confident that , he will get good hike in the pay package this time viz a viz Prem. Tilak was happy about his revision. Like any other euphoria , it quickly died down when he learned that Prem also got equal raise. He went to the Guru to talk about it.

Prem =>"Why it is that Prem also gets the same compensation when i am working hard and better?"

Guru =>"Salary is always paid for your opportunity cost , it is not for ur Performance.!!!!"

Prem =>"Why did u say so ?"

Guru =>"Prem always gets an offer letter from some XYZ company , when the revision is around the corner"

Work is Worship !

Yatiga was the heart throb of the whole company where Prem and Tilak were working. The whole company was mad after her. Tilak not interested in being second to none , was also trying to impress her. Whenever , Tilak does something Prem ought to do that.. so the saying goes in the company. Despite his ugly bespactacled look , Prem also proposed to Yatiga.

There is an old saying in English, "You have to be very careful before asking for something .. you will get it ." To the surprise of Prem , Yatiga showed interest in him.Maintaining any coveted girl is a drain on energy , resources etc. Prem was taking sweet revenge on the entire colleagues. He was more thrilled when it hurt Tilak !.

After couple of months , when they were hanging out at Barrista coffee house, Prem did tell Yatiga that Tilak was fond of her. Yatiga acknowledged that she knew Tilak was after her.

Prem =>"He is handsome , smart ..why me ?"

Yatiga =>"Look Prem, Such guys are only good for getting our office work completed..!"

Calming the fire

In their last company , Prem and Tilak were tensed when the announcement of the annual hike was around the corner. Sensing this Guru decided to play a prank on Tilak.

Guru =>"Tilak , i am going to give u two rupee hike "

Tilak's face become red and he started bragging about the things he has achieved in the past.

Guru =>"Wait , Wait ...i am going to give only one rupee to Prem "

Tilak suddenly did become calm.

Monotony

Tilak being a fellow who does not read much , has got shaky command over the English language. In sharp contrast , Prem is a person who is addicted to his dictionary. One day , when they were amongst their friends , Prem was curious about Tilak's stint as an intern with a Hyderabad based company.

Prem => "Was it Monotonous ?"

Tilak => "No. It was not Monotonous. But, doing the same task time and again can bore you. "

Prem and others in the room were laughing on this for the rest of the day.

Loyality

When Prem and Tilak were working for a company which is having office in Trivandrum , between their friendship affinity for the city was a ticklish issue. Prem hails from Kochi , which is the so called commercial capital of kerala. Like any person who is infested with regional chauvinism ,Tilak was bit vocal about his affinity towards Trivandrum. The company
had groups loyal to cultural capital of kerala and another for a town which it's residents consider as a city where "enlightened" live. The presence of the "third city loyalist" is restricted to one person.

Trivandrum is a beautiful city to live in as the "virus" of skyscrapr development model is still at it's infancy. Some people see it as a boon. Like in any other issue , there is an opposite camp which feels otherwise. Some neutrals and near neutral people are indifferent to the issue.

One evening when Prem , Tilak and their friends were having a chit chat , an image was recieved as an attachment to a email post.



















Due to a Japanese assisted drinking water project , the city has got intermittent pot holes. This has become an issue.

Prem => "Hey , this is in Trivandrum"

Tilak => "How are u sure that it is in Trivandrum ?"

Tilak =>"It is a KL-39 vehichle..ought to be Kochi !"

Prem =>"Ya , may be ..that is why those guys got assistance to come out of the pot hole!!!! "

The ensuing pandemonium between the Trivandrum and Kochi loyalists was settled only when the General Manager of the company intervened

Turnaround

Tilak used to watch lot of Tamil movies in his younger days. He was fond of Sathyaraj , VijayKanth , Prabhu and of course Rajnikanth. Malloos who are well known for their xenophobia used to take a dig at Tamils (Tamilians ? ) for obsessive worship of their film heroes. They some times site even examples from Kannada and Telugu as well. Tilak was on the receiving end for his liking for Rajnikanth.

Of late ,Tilak got pissed off when all of a sudden Malloos are crazy about Rajnikanth. His movies are even touted as family entertainer. Perplexed , Tilak went to his guru for advice.

Tilak =>" Why is this sudden change of attitude towards Rajnikanth. ?"

Guru => " Mammootty and Mohanlal has been in the lime light for long that now people are sick of watching them. It seems , a lobby is not allowing any others to get into the arena as well. Now as far as malloos are concerned , Rajnikant is a lesser "evil" than these super stars " !!!!

Science

Tilak discovered about Genetic algorithms through a friend of Prem. Being a person who has read Darwin extensively , he liked the computational model. For the next couple of months , Tilak was busy studying the stuff. Now a days , in most social gatherings Tilak will bring the limitations of conventional computing as a topic. Prem could make out that it is an attempt to bring Genetic Algorithms into the discussion.

Prem could not tolerate the exuberance of Tilak regarding Genetic algorithms. Once amongst their friends , Tilak brought the topic of Genetic Algorithms. Prem got restless and told Tilak that "Seeing ur enthusiasm for Genetic algorithms , i am reminded of a quote from Max Gluckman which goes as follows. A Science is any
discipline in which fool of this generation can go far beyond the point reached by the genius of earlier generation."

Subset Construction Program in C++

One day after flipping through a Discrete math book , i thought of writing a program to print all the subsets of a set of items. For simplicity , i thought of generating a subset from a string.Here is my
C++ program which generates all subsets of a set of characters

/////////////////////////////////////////////
// subset.cpp
// 
// A Simple Program to Print Subset of a string 
//
// Written By Praseed Pai K.T.
//          http://praseedp.blogspot.com    
//
//
//
// At the Visual studio command prompt
//
// cl subset.cpp
// subset "abcd"
// 
// if you are using PowerShell
// ./subset.exe "abcd"
//
//
// @ the GNU Linux Terminal
// gcc -o subset.exe subset.cpp
// ./subset.exe "abcd"     
//
//
//

#include <iostream>
#include <math.h>
#include <string.h>


using namespace std;

//////////////////////////
//
// A program to print subset of a string
//
// cl subset.cpp
// subset <string>
//

void main(int argc , char **argv)

{


    if ( argc != 2 ) {

        printf("Subset <string> \n" );

        return;

    }

    char str[9];
    memset(str,0,9);
    strncpy(str,(char *)argv[1],8);


    unsigned short int _MASK = 0;
    unsigned short int i=0;

    int bitcnt = strlen(str);

    _MASK = (unsigned short)pow(2.0,(double)bitcnt);

    while ( i < _MASK )
    {

        unsigned int _rs = 0;

        while ( _rs <= bitcnt )
        {

            if ( i & ( 1 << _rs ) )
                cout << str[_rs];

            _rs++;

        }

        cout << endl;

        i++;

    }

    return;
}

//EOF subset.cpp

Payout Ratio

Payout Ratio is a new term which i encountered today. The term is used in the gambling circles too often compared to other areas of finance. Payout ratio is the amount of money which gambling houses pays off in comparison to the money it has collected. One minister in the Goa cabinet was critical of Nepali controlled Gambling houses where payout ratio is only 2%. Being a tourist destination , the business is not concerned about the potential of repeat customers. Their clients are said to by price inelastic.